Losing your hearing can often come with a loss of feeling safe. I have sacrificed many hours of sleep to the anxious thoughts of not hearing something vital. Hearing loss definitely comes both with safety risks as well as anxious thoughts about safety.

Anxious thoughts can be really overwhelming and even debilitating. Sometimes, anxiety can be in response to the real risks and dangers you are facing. Other times, anxious thoughts are spiraling out of proportion to the risks and can really take over your life. If you are struggling with anxiety, I hope that you take care of yourself and get the help you need. I encourage you to reach out to professionals and be brave enough to accept the help they recommend.

One of the areas I have struggled most with feeling safe has actually been sleeping, which may sound counterintuitive. In general, it is rather lovely to be able to lay on my hearing ear and sleep well despite snoring bed partners or train whistles. However, I did sleep through a fire alarm once, and that was very concerning. Thankfully, it was a false alarm, but it got me worrying about hearing while sleeping. I have always primarily slept on my right side, which is my hearing side. Over time, I became very nervous when my husband was away overnight that I would miss important things. So, I decided to take steps to make me feel safer.

The first tool I found to help me feel more confident at night was a vibrating baby monitor. I did keep my second baby in my room a lot longer than when I was raising my first baby, and I was able to hear. Once the baby was not in my room, I loved having the options of the vibration and lights on the monitor to notify me. Just being able to look and see if the monitor was lighting up, so I knew the baby was actually making noise, helped alleviate the stress of laying there wondering if I did or did not hear a cry.

My next solution was using Sound Notifications on my Android phone. Sound Notifications is an accessibility feature on Android phones that can be turned on, so your phone listens for specific sounds like babies crying, alarms, running water, etc., and notifies you. I have my Sound Notifications on when I sleep alone and have it vibrate my smart watch to wake me up if needed. That really helps lower my anxiety, so I feel safer while sleeping.

Another area where I have felt unsafe is dealing with traffic on a bicycle. My left ear is deaf, so my deaf side is the traffic side. That was one of the reasons I wanted to get a hearing assistance device. My bone anchored hearing aid does an awesome job of letting me know that there is traffic, even if I can’t sound locate. I have become practiced at turning and looking for sounds. In general, head on a swivel and looking around all the time is an important safety tool when you have hearing loss, and it is one I frequently use while riding my bicycle.

A common stressful interaction can be utilizing a multiuse trail, where folks may be walking, running, or even cycling. The norm is to call out left when about to pass. It can be hard to hear that, especially when you are deaf on the left like myself. Again, my bone anchored haring aid helps a lot, though I have had times where my exercise partner has to let me know someone is attempting to pass. Also, the Acoustic Neuroma Association made these cool shirts to try to inform the person coming up behind you that you may not hear them trying to pass. https://anassociation.ecwid.com/Pass-with-Care-ANA-Unisex-t-shirt-p644865751

I am also shortly going to get a Ring doorbell. I am really looking forward to that as my doorbell is another thing I often miss. My house is a bit oddly structured, long and with many doorways separating rooms. That works great for keeping the noise from the children on the other side of the house, but I often miss when someone is at the door because I am too far away to hear knock or doorbell. I am looking forward to being aware of when someone is at my home by having the Ring doorbell notify my phone and watch.

Another tool I rely on heavily to help me feel safer is notifying people that I have hearing loss. In situations, I worry that not hearing may have high stakes, like flying, I wear a prominent name tag that says, “Hard of hearing.” I find this helps immensely with the expectations of people around me, and I feel a lot more comfortable.

I have also worried about missing critical information in the doctor’s office. They often talk quickly and say many jargon filled phrases. It can be hard to catch and remember 100% if your brain has to work harder to hear. I will often turn on a recording app on my phone so that I don’t have to stress as much about getting every detail perfect, and I have a reference to come back to.

I am so grateful to live in a time and place where I have access to so many different helpful technologies. I rely heavily on all this various tech, many of which utilize my phone and smartwatch. Even when I first started on this hearing loss journey, I didn’t have all these options. I am excited to see what the future brings, as more and more accessibility features are offered and become mainstream. It can be tiring, figuring out all these systems and programming them. But I find it so worth it to feel confident and safe as I go about my day.